Say Yes, If You Cannot Say No!

Sometimes we have trouble saying no.  An opportunity or temptation comes our way, and we are prone to give in to the temptation.  We may be saying 'No' because there is no established 'Yes'.

If we have a definite goal or standard that we want to achieve, we need to say 'Yes' to that good thing and have that resolve in our mind.  Then, when the 'No' temptation comes, we will be better able to stand strong.

Saying 'Yes' to one thing often means we are automatically saying 'No' to something else.

Examples?

If you have said 'Yes' to being fit and healthy, then you are well equipped to say 'No' to a night with a big bowl of ice cream in front of the TC.

If you are committed to being a virgin on your wedding day, that 'Yes' will strengthen your 'No' when you and your boyfriend end up alone.

Seems to me that this nugget might be helpful for me.  I just need to think about my 'Yes' choices.

Reference:  November 29, 2010 devotional from She Seeks

See Shannon's vlog response to this very issue.

Lack of Motivation

One area I struggle with is lack of motivation to do things.  This is more of an issue at home.  It is a strong, behavior controlling mindset.

First, you must understand that when I face this absence of desire and motivation to do anything, it has nothing to do with the weather.  Even the most beautifully sunny and pleasant day will cause me to feel no more motivation, even though my wife expects it to.

Part of the problem here could be my overall health.  I am overweight and primarily sedentary.  Therefore, I seldom feel high energy levels.  In addition, I sometimes feel just a little bit off, and that is sometimes worse on Saturday (the big work at home day).

Is it possible for motivation to show up?  Yes if I have a definite responsibility or deadline that I must meet, then once I get started, my motivation might increase and I will get the job done.  But, if there is no immediate deadline for completing various tasks, then it is not likely i will be breaking any records getting it done.

Thanks for reading.  By the way, I am looking for some helpful ideas for motivation.

Even More Foundation

There are plenty of differences between work and home, but there are also similarities.  I present the following from a work perspective, but some of it would apply just as well at home.

When I begin a new day, I have responsibilities, tasks, assignments, and expectations to fulfill.  Will I do them?  The answer depends on which fork in the road I take.

The good fork:

Approach the day with a positive attitude and perspective.  This is towards the tasks themselves, as well as the people I will interface with.

Consider what the goals are.  What will define a successful day?

Focus my thoughts and energy on reaching the goals.

Avoid distractions wherever possible.  Any distraction that merely consists of me choosing to do something could be avoided.  A distraction by someone else having a definite need is a different story.

When a thought or notion of procrastination is spotted (regardless of how it came to be), I need to replace it with a commitment to continue toward success.  A derailed train never reaches its destination.

The not so good fork:

Having wrong attitudes about the day before me.

Not having clear goals for the day.

Being distracted by any number of things that allow me to ignore my responsibilities, or to delay my work.

Being lazy or non-caring about the tasks that need to be done.

Having my focus on other things or other people.

Being critical of other people or blaming them for some situation in my life.


Obviously, the good fork is the only way to find success.

Two Different Places

While considering how I could Make It Better, I came to realize that my thoughts and attention are not always in the same place.  Maybe there are two different places.  Here is what I mean.

Many times throughout the day, and maybe quite often, my thoughts are extremely me-centered, in a simple kind of way.  It is easy to dwell on these things.

• What am I doing?
• What are other people doing?
• Do I like what I am doing?
• Do I need to do this now?
• Is it time to eat?
• Do I have anything to eat?
• Why am I cold or hot?
• Other people are noisy.
• Wonder what is new on drudgereport.com or my email accounts?
• Is the boss coming?
• Is it lunch time?
• Is it quitting time?

The other place is like this:

• What is my goal for today?
• What are the benefits of accomplishing that goal?
• Am I managing my time and schedule adequately?
• Will this approach look good to my colleagues and boss?
• Am I doing what the boss would expect of me?
• How can I improve on what I am doing?
• Have I considered the blessings of my job today?

 Can you see the difference?  I spend too much time on the top list, which does not help me be productive or responsible?

Where to Start?

When I created this blog and wrote the first posting, I had been struck with a relatively clear picture, or sense of what I wanted to do.  Since that posting, it has been interesting to see how muddled my thoughts can be.  The topic of self-improvement is broad, so there are various paths I can take.  This hesitation about which way to go and what I want to write about is not new.  It happens relatively often when I blog.

Here are a few of the factors that will influence my writing as I try to Make It Better:

As I write about solutions, I will balance the Christian perspective with the straightforward human perspective, for I am both a person and a Christian.

I will need to consider how specific I want to be with details of my life.

I will cover issues related to home, the work place and the market place.

I will ask questions of my readers.  For instance, now I am asking how you would approach something like this.  Thanks for your comments.

Dennis

Can I Make It Better?

Just suppose there are aspects of my life that are not how I think they should be, or how I want them to be.  There are plenty of reasons for why my life is what it is, and why I am the person I am.  But that is in the past.  Living in the present, I generally just accept things the way they are and plod through one day after another.  That can be done, and it may even have some benefits.  Sometimes, though, I have the insight to see that approach as selling life short.

So, I am thinking, that in many areas of my life, such as:

• personal life
• spiritual life
• life as a man
• marriage
• father
• employee

I can find some ways to Make It Better, and that is what I intend to do with the goal of achieving success.